Sunday, September 29, 2013

so far, so good...

Sister is handling the new chemo really well.
She's usually pretty tired for the balance of the week but a couple
of extra naps keeps her going. Other than that, the following two
weeks are pretty much normal. (She gets a dose every 3 weeks.)
Third treatment is this coming Tuesday. After the second
treatment, they finally noticed the cancer appeared to be 
shrinking. All we can do right now is wing it and hope for the best.

Summer is gone but the days continue to be beautiful.

Thank you all for your good wishes, prayers and thoughts.

Friday, August 09, 2013

TDM-1...

Her oncologist saw a spot she didn't like. 
Biopsy came back positive.

The herceptin she's been on obviously isn't 
holding back the cancer. She starts chemo again
with a drug that was just released this year...TDM-1
Her first session is August 20.
She might also need more surgery.

Good news is that tests did not show the cancer 
spreading to her bones or other organs.


Tuesday, July 30, 2013

computer go bye-bye...

I shouldn't complain, I guess. Bought it in 2004 for less than $300.

Even when there is a valid reason for change, I still rebel against.
Familiarity breeds comfort. But, isn't that one way abusers keep
their claws in the abused? Shame on me.

We were busy for a while organizing the annual family reunion.
It poured rain the whole day but we rent a nice community
building for the event, so we all stayed dry while sampling a
huge variety of food and visiting with many relatives.
My siblings and I get to run the show again next year and then
hand over the organizing to Uncle Paul's kids for their turn.

No idea how often I'll be back here. I didn't seem to miss blogging
like I thought I might when I was first computer-less.
Perhaps seven years is enough. Perhaps I'll have a brain spark
on occasion.Whatever.

I'm chipping away at my to-do list in my own time, as usual.
Life isn't bad.

Friday, June 21, 2013

words fail me...

Probably more accurate to say that
I'm failing the words.

I think I need to do something different.
Photos. Drawing. Crocheting. Volunteering.
My mind needs to be jarred into awareness.
Or, put to sleep permanently and stop wasting space.

Should have enough money saved to get an old,
high-mileage, cheap car...soon.
I really, really miss my independence and freedom.
A prisoner of necessity, I'm clawing at the walls.

I'm not giving up but don't expect much.

Monday, June 10, 2013

is it me or is it you?...













Haven't said much lately 'cause I'm really, really tired of whining
and my brain has refused to spew anything else.
Medication might be helpful. No insurance puts that out of reach.

Shadows are relentless.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Saturday, May 04, 2013

May Daze...

The first Saturday in May will be saturated
in baseball, after the lawn gets mowed.












Might the Indians continue their winning streak?
My sisters and I will be cheering them on from the
comfort of the living room. There may be margaritas
to accent the mood.

After the game, win or lose, we'll grab an early dinner
and then see the Jackie Robinson movie '42'.

 Go Tribe!

















 

Saturday, April 27, 2013

nuttin' honey...

Remember that line from a Jimmy Buffett song?...
"The weather is here, wish you were beautiful"
That's how nice it's been today in Akron, O hi O.
 68 degrees, beautiful blue sky and a lovely breeze.
Today would make a perfect forever.
Well, the weather part anyway.
I guess it's up to us to plug in the preferred details.

Hope where you are is just as lovely.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Persistence - haiku...


I tried and I tried
to hang on to what I had.
sanity slippery.
 
This Haiku Monday is hosted by Serendipity.
She chose "persistence" for this week's theme.
Visit her blog to read all the entries
and to leave one of your own.

Tuesday, April 09, 2013

Haiku Winner...

So many entries and so many variations on the theme.
I was tempted by several so I took a break and came back
this afternoon to read again with fresh eyes and rested
brain. One stood out as the one which most framed what
had been in my head...

Color arises,
though ground is hard, dry as bone.
Rock garden rainbow.

Thank you, Serendipity!
The photo she used for illustration is beautiful, too.

Serendipity will be next week's host for Haiku Monday.

All of you who took the time to create and enter your
haiku are wonderful, talented and thoughtful.
Bless you all.

Friday, April 05, 2013

Haiku Monday -- BLOOM...

The subject for Monday's Haiku challenge is -

******** BLOOM (noun or verb) *********

Format should be the old, reliable 5-7-5.

Please limit the number of your submissions for
judging to two. Leave your entries in comments here.

Lastly, do not use the word bloom in your haiku.

Posting an image on your blog for illustration is welcome.

Submission deadline is midnight Monday eastern time.

I'm looking forward to reading lots and lots of haiku.

Have fun!

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Doom does Haiku... (update)

Wowwza!... Doom said my haiku WON.
I'll figure out something for the next contest and post it Friday.

*******


I haven't written haiku in a long time.
Doom heads up the contest for Monday
and has set interesting parameters.
Go here to read what he asks for.

His topic is: "The Beast Within"
my entry...


the beast
is self,
denied.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

The worst is over (knock on wood)...

Radiation treatments were completed Wednesday. 44 total.
Absolutely no other appointments for the rest 
of the month besides her herceptin infusion
which continues every three weeks.
She has a visit with the oncologist early in April
and I fully expect her to be released for work.

Her trip through all aspects of the process continue
to be amazing, especially considering the prognosis
handed down last March immediately after diagnosis.

I'm not needed much anymore, except for monitoring
finances. Her understanding is limited.

It's time to evaluate myself and my direction.

Friday, March 08, 2013

Found...

at 'The Hammock Papers' ...


"Being right all the time acquires a huge importance
in education, and there is this terror of being wrong.
The ego is so tied to being right that later on in life you
are reluctant to accept that you are ever wrong, because
you are defending not the idea but your self-esteem.
This terror of being wrong means that people have
enormous difficulties in changing ideas."

-Edward De Bono

Friday, February 22, 2013

ice, ice baby...

I think, maybe, sorta, that I'd rather have some
snow on the ground than the ice we woke to this
morning. (Here's hoping I didn't just jinx myself.)

At least you can see where the snow is. Ice is like
being blind. Took three attempts to get the car up
the driveway when we got back from the grocery. Yikes.
Even though it seems to be melting now, I still tossed
salt on the driveway and sidewalk 'cause I'm pretty
sure it will only get colder as the day moves into night.
Yesterday the icicles were melting while snow fell.
Ohio weather is schizophrenic.

Carol started her radiation treatments last Tuesday.
This afternoon will be treatment #18. They're zapping
her twice a day, five days a week.
She's handling it very well. Only a bit of itching across
the scar but otherwise, no redness, no swelling, no
drain on her energy. I rarely go with her since all I can
do is read the magazines in the waiting area. I make sure
dinner is ready when she gets home. The girl can eat.
And does.

I miss my life.
I miss Sparky.
I miss privacy.
I miss freedom.

Have I mentioned that I still have mood swings?

Monday, February 04, 2013

It's never going to stop, is it?...












Snow still falling.
No end in sight.

I lucked out the other day because one of
the neighbors cleared the driveway with his
snow blower. All I had to do was the sidewalk
and front stoop and steps, then toss about
35 lbs of rock salt on everything.
But it's been non-stop again today so I bought
more salt to fling before the snow builds up again.

(That isn't my sister's yard. Her house is on a mini
hill that adds to the treacherousness.)

It will be another week or more before she gets
her radiation schedule. They took measurements
to make blocks/molds to hold her in place during
treatments. Much thumb twiddling until those are done.

Maybe I'll make a big batch of cookies for the neighbor
with the snow plow.

 

 

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

gearing up for the next phase...

We'll find out tomorrow what the schedule
will be for her radiation treatments. Original
plan was twice a day for 5-6 weeks.

I'm not sure what would be happening if
she weren't getting help with paying her
COBRA insurance premiums.

Hard to believe that it's been nearly nine
months since I moved up here.

Friday, January 25, 2013

Senior Prom...

I gotcha all beat, Joe.


















You and your buds are flashing pics from
the 70s and 80s. pfffttt.

This is from my Senior Prom 1969.
Just further proof that I am older than dirt.

My mom made that dress.
 

Friday, January 18, 2013

Mrs. Dull's teacakes...
















She needed a way to support her family.
Read her story here.

Many years ago, my then mother-in-law loaned me
her copy of this book. I hated to give it back and 
have been hoping to find a copy for myself.

You may not think of describing a cook book as charming but,
this one is absolutely that and more.
Her teacake recipe is a genteel way of making scrumptious
cookies. But she also tells you how to barbeque a rabbit.
Or prepare possum.




 







Friday, January 11, 2013

gosh darn you!

My sister insists that she will never swear.

Make three piles.
One of poop. One of crap. One of shit.

Examine each pile closely.
Take a big whiff of each.

They're all the same thing, asshole.

Monday, January 07, 2013

Surgery complete...

What a relief when things turn out better than one's
imagination will lead one to fear.

There's one long incision from the middle of her chest
to just under her arm. No skin grafts.
Two drain tubes that I empty and record the quantity
twice a day.

Surgery started at 1 pm Thursday, lasted almost three
hours, spent two hours in recovery and she was back
home before 2 pm Friday. She has refused to take anything
for pain. Well, I talked her into taking one Motrin when
she mentioned her lower back was stiff. She argued
about taking that! She insists that there is only a tiny
bit of discomfort and I'm not seeing any signs that would
contradict that. (Her bottle of Percocet is looking pretty
good to me.)

The surgeon said they did not remove all the cancer.
The team decided that removing everything surgically
would make her healing too risky and delay radiation.
She has a follow-up visit with the oncologist on Thursday
and the surgeon on Friday. The surgeon is hoping the healing
will be complete in three weeks so radiation can be started
soon after that.

And, in the meantime, she's still getting herceptin infusions
every three weeks. Indefinitely. Those are pretty simple
compared to full chemo. One hour, start to finish.

As long as radiation will knock out the rest of the cancer,
things look pretty good.

You lovely folks who keep visiting here and offering good
thoughts, prayers and encouragement are very, very much
appreciated. I send big virtual thank-you hugs out to all of you.

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

Happy New Year...


I make no predictions or resolutions.
 
I wish all good things to all of you.
 
Sincere thanks to everyone for staying around.
 
♥