it isn't always...

what your eyes see
isn't always all there is.
yet, if you look too hard,
the best might be missed.

Here I go again...

computer is in the shop. Power supply...?


UPDATE: (Saturday) This time it was simple.
The power switch on the tower broke...
and they fixed it for FREE.
Like I told Erica in comments, I'm taking this
as a sign that things are looking up.

This is silly...

I haven't had much good to say here lately.
Poetry is dead in my heart.

No idea why anyone visits here at all any more but,
you folks deserve better from me.

Gonna back off from this place for a bit until I can
relay some good news and/or something worthy
of reading. Maybe I'll re-post some of the old stuff.

I will continue to visit and comment at your places.
This is too addicting to go cold turkey.

Be well, my friends.

UPDATE - For the first time ever...

my mortgage payment is late.

I called customer service, wanting to explain and
hoping for an exemption from the late fee but, I
was unable to find an option to talk to a live rep.
Checking on line gave me info for the closest office,
twenty-five miles away, so I'll call them today.

You see, I'm in the group that the media is calling
"the 99-ers". Still unemployed. My last UC check was
deposited July 8. The emergency extension was signed
July 20 (22?) but the money distribution is just now
beginning. I was told I couldn't re-apply until I received
some official letter in the mail and those were not going
to be sent out until last week. I waited all week and was
finally able to make contact by phone on Friday to ask
when I might expect the paperwork.
Turns out they are late in mailing. The man I talked to
in Tallahassee gave me a new website to access and do
the application on line but it's still going to be at least
two weeks before I might see some of the money.
Almost two months with no income other than some orders
through the store. I'm almost tapped out financially and
emotionally is getting pretty edgy, too.

I really don't like being unemployed.
In all this time of searching for a job, I have not been
called one time. Nada. Zip.

However, last week presented a very, very tiny light way
beyond the end of the tunnel. I found out that a former
employer is doing some light hiring. Two people I worked
with have been hired. I hauled ass to get an application
filled out last Wednesday. I worked for this organization
from 1986 to 1989. Yeah, twenty-one years ago.

They're hiring part-time, to keep their expenses down.
No benefits but the 31 hours per week would pay a decent
chunk more than unemployment.
I'd take the job in a heartbeat. And be very glad for it.

I'd like to ask that you send out some good vibes, say a
prayer, cross your fingers... whatever.

This is not how I expected to be living my life at this age.
***********************

update: Finally made human contact via telephone with
the mortgage company (Chase) yesterday. One rep is
mailing a 'loan modification packet'. Not sure if that will
do me any good but, I'll read it and see what might be
offered. I only have nine years left on the loan and I hate
to extend the time. Interest rate is currently 5.75% .
After being transferred umpteen times, I finally got to
talk to the department that could help only to be told that
I needed to call back today (Tuesday). holyshit and grrrrr.
So, I obediently called today to be told they will only forgive
half of the late fee. ($19.51 minus half = $9.76) And, they
will only do this one time. (thanksalot, you corporate whore)
Where is the benefit to being a good customer for many years?
I've made mortgage payments since 1986, albeit not to the
same company all that time, but still... 24 years is only worth
$9.76 ?????

No word yet on the part-time job, although they did hire
another former co-worker this week. Fingers still crossed.

A dear friend submitted my resume to the large company the
friend has worked for for many years. Nothing available
locally but, a few possibilities in Ohio.
Includes moving expenses. Friend has more confidence in
me than I do.

In other news... it was 88 degrees when I woke this morning.
Last time I checked the temperature, it was reading 101.
We can easily add 10 degrees for the humidity.
Ice water is also my friend. And Sparky's.

Not least of all... thank you all for your kind words of support!

Friday the 13th...

ooooooh. booga booga booga.

Stop it.

'superstition' (Oxford English Dictionary)-
n. excessively credulous belief in and reverence
for the supernatural. A widely held but
irrational belief in supernatural influences,
especially as bringing good or bad luck.

Have a great weekend!

Sparrow's view...

as a business owner. Where does it end?

bonk, bonk, bonk...

Nothing but a dull thud echoing from my
empty brain-container. Gray matter has
mostly melted in the recent return of
high heat and humidity.
I've heard they're canceling Fall this year.
Gonna have two Summers instead.

I need...
I want...

Oh hell. Hell.
I don't remember asking for it.
Or making a deal and losing.
But, right now, it sure feels like I did a
whole big bunch of somethin' bad and
got caught. Some other life ago? Last year?

Am I channeling a really bad Beat poet?

Time for another glass of ice-water before bed.
I like to let it dribble down my neck and over
my chest and down my stomach.
Feels good with the fan blowing on me.
Sometimes the good feeling lasts long enough
to hook me up with the Sandman for the night.

Other sometimes the sticky air is heavier than a
wet sheet but it can't be thrown off, no matter how
much tossing and turning I do.
It's better, during those other sometimes, to just
lie very still and naked in front of the fan.

Sweet dreams.

another SuperModel...

What can I say?

Pondering attire is showing up everywhere.
Thank you, Michael!

Who's next?

No book contains reality...

Which is why I like reading so much.

Pondering across the Pond...

This is Susie Hemingway wearing her new Pondering hat.
She writes here about her life in the U. K. with her
handsome husband Hamada. Isn't she a beauty?
She has a book of poetry for sale, all proceeds going
to cancer research.

Thank you, Susie, for sending the photo. I love it.

I also want to thank everyone who has ordered products
from the Pondering....... store. I can't tell you how much
I appreciate your support, especially in these rough times.

I'd love to post more photos from any of you
wearing/using/displaying your Pondering products.
Don't be shy!

*
In other news... we got some rain and relief from the heat.
Hallelujah.
It may not last long but I will enjoy it as long as it lasts.
And, the poison ivy is getting better. Did I mention the poison ivy?
Yeah, itchy itchy rash to go with the horrid heat. Yuck.
But, it's better and so am I.

Hope you all had a great weekend.