...there's a clenched fist in my chest and my nerves
are as strained as catgut on a guitar (piano? violin? whatev).
I've been spoiled during the past year. It was February 2020
since Carol's last hospital stay and considering the Covid crap,
we have been very lucky. And very careful.
She got her second vaccination today with no side effects at all
and Ann and I are getting our second vaccination on the 19th.
So why would I be at all stressed?
In the last couple weeks she's been scheduled for multiple
procedures and tests that make me worry. One procedure is a
heart catheterization and another involves removing a large
growth on her scalp. And then the heart doctor decided just
the other day that he wants some kind of lung test done.
All of these procedures require blood work and a Covid test.
ALL of this rigamarole is scheduled during the next two weeks.
The only doctor who will allow me to go with her to her
appointments is the surgeon. The other doctors follow Covid
restrictions that only allows the patient in the facility unless the
patient needs physical help or help communicating.
So, I have to rely on Carol to fill me in and unfortunately she
often gets confused about what they're telling her. And she will
not question anything she's told when it comes from any person
she considers to be an authority. Well, you probably know that
I ask questions about everything. I don't like not knowing
especially when it comes to health situations.
I don't think anyone else worries because they know I will.
Does that sound like "poor me" whining?
So guess where I spent a couple of hours on Friday?
A funeral home.
Nobody died. This was for me.
Did the pre-planning thing for a simple cremation, no viewing,
no service. Even picked out a headstone. All that's left is to
talk to the cemetery people.
I feel so much better.